Fun With Sleep

Do not wake me up. Seriously. Just don't. I say this as a public service announcement. One of two things will happen:

1 - I won't be able to fall back asleep and I will spend the remainder of the time that I should have been sleeping gently kicking you and talking about how you suck at life.

2 - I will speak incoherently and loudly and then pass out again. It's at these times you will feel like you are sleeping next to an elderly and grumpy man who may have gone completely deaf.

Number 2 happened on Saturday. I woke to see Texas standing in the door way, on guard. I asked what was wrong wrong. And what I heard back was: There's someone breaking into the house. So I sat straight up and screamed 'WHAT???' and he turned around and said 'It's a skunk!' at which point I jumped out of bed and screamed at the top of my lungs: 'WHY IS THERE A SKUNK TRYING TO BREAK INTO YOUR HOUSE?' And then I went back to sleep.

Clearly, it was not a renegade skunk out to steal my jewels. It was a skunk who had been hit by a car in the dead of night right outside the front gate and graced us all with a parting gift of Horrible Funky Smell. It lasted until about 3PM. Thanks Easter!