I am getting on a teeny tiny wee smidgen of a little plane to go see two of them get married. Yeah. Wanna see how big?
I swear to God that is actual size. There are 26 seats. I can fit more people in my living room. AND MY LIVING ROOM DOESN'T FLY THROUGH THE AIR.
So needless to say, John, I apologize, but I may show up drunk to your wedding. You see, the sheer amount of booze and Xanax that will make it possible for me to get on said teeny, tiny, wee, little plane will take roughly 2 to 4 weeks to burn off. Ergo, I will be ever so slightly out of it at the wedding and for the entire month of May/June. In fact, I may start drinking now in preparation. Seriously. The idea of getting on said midget plane makes me want to vomit and then run around in small circles screaming. And I still have a month to go. Fun times for me and my loved ones. Well, specifically Texas as he will be seated next to me and may need to get his arm replaced after I claw it off mid flight in a drunken panic.
Am I an awesome girlfriend or what?
5 comments:
And here is the bad part. (Sorry Texas,) I have been on one of these planes and they tend to fly sideways when a strong wind gets them. OH how I would love to have flim of this. LOL sorry
Oh wow, looks like the size of the plane I ride on all the time. You can feel every single bump. Did you know that there were no barf bags on the plane? I had no escape plan, I thought about barfing in my purse...but thank God it never happened.
It could be worse...you could be traveling in said plane to somewhere remote, like, oh, I dunno, South Dakota?
I was on those puddle jumpers every week back and forth to Cincinnati and they are a bit bumpy. On the bright side? They usually have more leg room!
Hopefully you're not on our flight and hog all the booze. Oh, and just a warning, better get boozed up in Denver, because there might not be any booze on this flight. I suggest bringing a flask and asking the airport bartender to fill it up!
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