Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Me...Kind of

Well, if I were yellow. And 2D.

Thursday, July 26, 2007

Hodge Podge

Last night the boy and I went to see a show called Mortified. If you haven't heard of it or seen it I can not recommend it highly enough. It's hilarious. In short, the show features people reading from their childhood diaries. It changes each show. My favoritelast night? A girl who was a born again Christian at 12 and wrote a song about Jesus to convert her BFF so as to save her from eternal damnation. The best line of the song was 'God made Adam with a pleasurable mouth'. Ah, classy.

It did remind me a lot of my youth. I know, you'll all be very shocked to learn I was not cool. Pick your jaws up off the floor. I actually looked like the human QTip, an excellent look I assure you. I had white blonde hair which my mom insisted on keeping short and permed. Who's a looker? Meghan is. I was also really, really into books and chubby. If that doesn't spell most popular kid in school I don't know what does.

Afterwards we stopped by the drug store to pick up a few odds and ends. Here's the deal, I am a sucker for advertising. As such I purchased the new prescription strength deodorant. I figured, hey, it's summer and warm, who doesn't need a little extra help? The deodorant came with instructions. This was the first cause for concern. Apparently you need to apply it at night so that it soaks in. So, I did. That powdery fresh scent you caught about 11PM? That was me. Seriously people in Uganda can smell me at this moment. I am pungent. I of course, being calm and rational 100% of the time, flapped my arms around and ran in a small circle. I finally collapsed and the boy and I fell asleep noses buried in our pillows hoping to escape my new Secret. Oh and no, it doesn't wash off. It's there for the next 24 hours. MINIMUM.

On a side note, I am sleepy. I am but a wee, delicate flower and if someone in Burbank sneezes I am up for the rest of the night. It's super fun being me.

Side note number 2, I read Harry Potter 7...twice. I am like one step away from dressing up in costume and wearing it to work. Sad, sad little life, but it's all mine. Jealous?

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Guest Writer

A very brave friend of mine recently started a blog about her journey to lose weight. We met back in the day when I was really heavy. Like, really, really heavy. I have since lost a lot of weight, more than I talk about in this piece, but it's something I still struggle with. As such she asked me to do a guest entry on her blog

So...ta da!

Monday, July 09, 2007

Poodle Visit

My brother just left for home and I'm sad. It was so much fun having him here. Even Disney was awesome. We had the best ride karma I have ever witnessed. By 11AM we had literally run out of things to do because we had done 10 rides in less than 3 hours. We ended up doing most rides two times and just walking around aimlessly. As I am the biggest nerd alive I had a pedometer with us solely because I wanted to see how far we walked. How far did we walk you ask? Well, 33,291 steps which is roughly 14.72 miles. I was thinking about doing a 13 mile marathon in November, but, yeah, that's not gonna happen. 13 miles is a really long way. Far too long to be on one's feet. Or surrounded by tourists. Shudder.

Saturday I got a group together to go see a movie in a cemetary, it's a thing in LA. Unfortunately it's also a thing in LA to have a lot of people attempt to go the same place at the same time so after an hour of waiting in the car line we found out the event was sold out. So we all headed back to my apartment and had a pic nic in the living room. I enjoy the living room pic nic because there are no bugs, I can wear pajamas and again, no tourists. And I am able to use my friends to gang up on my brother and wrestle him to the ground without strangers staring. The reason for the wrestle involves his hair. He has this weird white boy deflated afro happening. Hence the nickname 'Poodle', as he seriously resembles a fancy dog. We all wrestled him down and I teased his hair into a full afro and I have to say it was very becomming. It's a wonder he doesn't visit more.

Today we mostly hung out and laid low. We also went to see Sicko, which if you haven't seen, man, go see it now. Phenominal. Afterwards the Poodle and I discussed politics and the state of the world. He's one sharp cookie. And also impressive in the amount of food he can consume without gaining an ounce. He's 5'10 and 135 and in a day easily eats enough food to take care of Uganda for a year. I shake my fist at him and his ridiculous teenage metabolism.

My brother is hands down the coolest 14 year old in the history of the world. I love that kid.

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

I'm a Winner

Last night I was hanging out and watching tv. I was flipping back and forth between the Foof Network special on calzones and beer and The Learning Channels special on the Brookhaven Obesity Clinic. It took me about 10 minutes to realize that wasn't right.

I rule.

Monday, July 02, 2007


Who's the douche who despises the heat and yet moved to Southern California? Yeah, that would be me. I HATE the heat. Loathe and deplore. Especially when I live in a (albeit amazing) 1940's apartment with no central air. Basically we are paying for 1400 square feet but are using approximately 400 which I have dubbed 'the cool zone'. The apartment is gigantic but doesn't have a lot of doors. Ergo it's not ale to cool off using air conditioner window units except in the bedroom. This is where I am living. All the time. It's kind of like being an invalid, but a comfortably cool invalid. So I am ok with it.

Last week the boy and I went to the opening night of the Hollywood Bowl. It was absolutely amazing. Kirk Douglas gave a speech, Placido Domingo sang and Jack Black did a back flip. One of the benefits of living here is the fact that everyone 'in the business' lives here too, so they randomly show up at things. Seeing Kirk Douglas in person was fantastic, I kind of wanted to pinch his cheeks and talk about the old days. I don't think he'd appreciate that but it would bring me joy. And really, that's all that's important.

My brother is coming to visit this week and I am beyond excited. He wants to go to Disneyland and apparently as it's California State Law that I go at least once every 2 weeks, I'm taking him. I just hope my ride karma holds out. And that I am able to leave without injuring a tourist. Fingers crossed.