Monday, August 10, 2009

The Tub Story

So, believe it or not, I'm a modest girl. Like uber modest. I wear a lot of J. Crew and think v-necks on me are kind of slutty. Oh yeah, livin' it up! Somehow I decided it it was a really good idea to take my super modest ass, strip down and soak in tubs with strangers. My brain is a magical place to be at times.

How this all started was of course: Liz. You see she's a big fan of these day spas in Koreatown. For $15 you are given access to a room full of spas and saunas. The only catch is that you must enjoy said spas and saunas totally in the buff. This would be fine if they oh, let one person in at a time. However, that does not good business make and thus it's open to lots and lots of people. Lots and lots of naked people.

As this is the year of Meghan Conquers Her Fears (see jumping off cliffs, parasailing, internet dating) she suggested I get over my fear of The Naked. Apparently I had some sort of mental breakdown and I agreed. And that is how two Sundays ago I found myself in Koreatown with one of my best good friends, desperately clutching a paper thin robe and then walking around in what can only be described as Blind Panic in Your Birthday Suit.

Dudes. It is awkward. And yet? Awesome. Especially the giant tub full of boiling tea. Boiling tea that you sit in, with like 15 other naked chicks. Trying desperately to keep your eyes looking upward. It's HARD. There is a natural tendency to stare at well, the sea of boobs. To judge. To take note of any new waxing techniques. To judge.

After about 2 hours of soaking though you relax. You lay around on the jade floors in the buff and stop thinking 'how in God's name can this be sanitary????' and instead focus on the 'Wow, this is comfy and I could take a nap'. You also forget you are TOTALLY FUCKING NUDE and just kind of walk around and haphazardly soak in tubs. Then you get ready to leave and put back on your clothes and balk at the restraint jeans provide.

Then about an hour later you have another total mental breakdown because hello, just spent the afternoon naked with strangers.

And yet? Will totally do it again. Again, my brain is a magical, magical place to be.


Chuck said...

"the sea of boobs"
My new favorite phrase.

I'm going to start my own religion and Heaven will be equated to "the sea of boobs" If you want in on the ground floor, I'll let you be the new Jesus. I promise not to crucify you. You may be asked to wear a low cut shirt, though...

This spa sounds wonderful, but I don't think I could do it if I had to be around a bunch of naked dudes. I'm not a fan of sausage fests...

I'm glad you were able to relax for a little while, though. We all need to have some terror/relax/terror in our lives now and then.


Chris said...

Next time, you need to bring your tiara. Maybe as a side-bar to the regular bloggery, you could make it a thing to go swimming in the sea of boobs with a different and slightly inappropriate (yet not so much so that you're kicked out) piece of headgear. A tiara, one of those contraptions that holds braces in place, a fez... the list could be endless.

Sera said...

My main take away from this story? LA to so f-ing weird.