Tuesday, June 24, 2008

An Open Letter

Dear Body,

Hey, long time no talk. I wanted to reach out to you about something specific, something a little hard to talk about. You may want to sit (I know you are more comfortable that way). Body, you are not a robot. You in fact need sleep. I know it's summer with the heat and the sun rising at 5AM. That however does not, I repeat DOES NOT, that you need to get up at 5AM. Perhaps you have some ancient muscle memory of our ancestors in Poland and the plowing of the fields. Those times have passed. You can tell by the lack of plows and chickens in the house. But body, you should have a conversation with Ms. Brain. She's the one weeping in the 'upstairs unit'. You see she needs the sleep to help form the words properly. Sleep helps Ms. Brain realize that she has typed 'midget' instead of 'midst' in an email to a CEO BEFORE she sends it. The before is crucial but due to lack of sleep it was not realized and caused confusion because 'in the midget of a project' doesn't make much sense when you think about it, now does it? Let's work together body, I think we can do it. And if you don't get on board damnit, you will meet Mr. Ambien. I thank you in advance for your corporation.

Hugs and Kisses,
Me

2 comments:

Becky said...

Please let me know if this works. If it does my body is going to get a stern letter about the fat it keeps accumulating.

AJ said...

Your body really ought to have the capsity to understand that.