This weekend my mom and brother are coming to visit. I am incredibly excited about it. Except for one small thing. My apartment. It's a shade on the untidy side. And by that I mean I have a clear path from my bed to the living room and about 25% of my clothes are put away. This would be a small problem for most but it's a bigger problem for me as my mom is the female version of Danny Tanner.
My mom is the cleaning Nazi. The woman picks up lint from the floor, puts it in her pocket, and then empties it out in the trash later. She gets excited about organizing things. Me? I take all my belongings, spin around, throw them in the air and go 'Whee!'. For the past week I have attempted to clean but I have come to discover I don't like it. Not only that, I am really bad at it. My brain just doesn't work that way. I have a bag full of desk stuff that should be sorted and properly put away. What did I do? Shook the bag out into a drawer that was already full, squished it down and closed it. If my mom opens that drawer (or let's face it any closet or drawer in the house) she will have a heart attack. I may then also get grounded.
Maybe I'll just get her drunk the second she gets off the plane and keep her drunk the whole time? Could work. As long as I get her drunk in a very clean and orderly fashion.