Tuesday, September 16, 2008

The Vice Squad

I am currently without any vices. I am a person who desperately needs vices as it distracts me from the problems of the world and/or idiots who need to be yelled at with large words they won't understand. Currently I am without the following:

- I don't do drugs
- I don't smoke
- There are no boys at all in my life, not even one to flirt with harmlessly, ergo, no boom boom
- I am not drinking alcohol (let that one sink in for a moment)
- I am not ingesting any of the following: carbs, sugar, caffeine

I am the hardest core Mormon an agnostic has ever been. Do I get the special magical underpants now? Those special magical underpants better arrive post haste and they better bring with them a giant doughnut filled with vodka.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

You are awesome. Love the term "boom boom" It's really that bad, you have been driven to use onomatopoeias.
Also why does the handicap man appear next to my name when I type it in? Does everyone know about my disease? He, he!

kel said...

You desparately need some fun in your life. And by fun, I mean church.