While on the phone with my mom this evening I had the following conversation:
Me: I have been having weird, intense cravings. Like 'if I don't eat a pear RIGHT NOW I will hurt someone or die, perhaps both'. But, I know I'm not pregnant as I highly doubt I'm the prime candidate for immaculate conception.
Her: Well, yes. I would assume God would choose someone who says 'fuck' a lot less frequently.
The best part? She whispered the word fuck. And then I posted it on the internet.